Sometimes your teen may want to approach a teacher but is not sure what to say. Especially if this is his first year of high school, he may feel a bit intimidated.

Most high school teachers are eager to hear from a student who is trying to do better in class. Remember, few things are more important to a teacher than knowing a student is truly interested in the subject she's teaching.

If your teen isn't sure he's communicating well enough during class time, urge him to speak with her directly.

Suggest he approach his teacher just before or just after class. If there isn't enough time to talk then, they can set up a time for later.

What to say? Try these:

* Can you recommend a book (other than the text) that can help me understand the lesson?

* Can you explain this concept in a different way?

* If you had to study for our upcoming test, how would you do it?

* I have an idea for extra credit. Will you tell me what you think?

Keep Your Cool When You Deal With a Bad Report Card

You suspected there might be trouble. But you had no idea your teen's report card would look like this. Use these suggestions on how to handle the situation:

* Don't panic, and don't lose your cool. Studies show that either can lead to worse grades in the future. If you're having trouble staying calm, say, "Let's talk about this after dinner."

* Look for strengths as well as weaknesses. Even a teen with a terrible report card must be doing something right.

* Talk with your teen's teachers. Find out what is causing the bad grades. Is your teen not doing homework? Could he have a learning problem?

* Make sure your expectations are realistic. Some parents believe that anything less than all A's is a "bad report card." Yet even the most gifted students will not do well in every subject.

* Ask what the school can do to help your teen. Does he need to be moved to another class? Is there a tutoring program? Can he stay after school to get help from the teacher?

* Ask what you can do. Do you need to enforce a regular study time?

* Motivate your teen to do better. Some teens respond to positive motivators. ("You can have the car on Friday night if you pass your math test.")

Some teens need negative motivators. (Until your grades come up, you are restricted from using the phone.") See which works best with your teen.

Teach Your Teen that You Are Still The Parent

Many parents use "time out" with their younger kids. But it's not too easy to take a six-foot linebacker to his room. The technique can still work, but with a twist:

If you find yourself in an argument with your teen, take a deep breath. Say, calmly, "I am not going to argue with you about this". Then go to your room. Close the door. Relax.

Questions & Answers

Q: Some children in my daughter's kindergarten class are already reading. She knows a few words, but she is not reading yet. Should I be worried? Is it time to talk to her teacher?

A: Those few early readers in a kindergarten class can make other parents anxious. For most children, reading will come naturally in the first grade. In the meantime, parents can do some things that will help their children become good readers:

* Most important is daily reading,. Parents need to set up a regular reading time. Read stories and poems. Read things from the newspaper. Get into the habit of reading regularly. Sometimes, ask your child to retell the story in her own words. Or see if she can act it out.

* Art work can also help your child learn to read. When she draws a picture, ask her to tell you a story about it. Write down the story as she tells it to you.

* Play work games. Say, "I'm thinking of something that is red. " See if your child can guess what you're thinking about. Or see who can come up with the longest list of rhyming words.

There are a few signs that a child may have reading problems. Talk to your daughter's teacher if she can't do these things:

* Tell left from right. It's important in reading.

* Identify common shapes like circles and squares. This is the same skill she'll need to see the difference between the letter d and the letter b.

* Hear beginning sounds. Say a work like, "mmmmmmmmonkey." Have her repeat the first sound.

Often, a little extra help in kindergarten can prevent reading problems in the future.

Set & Maintain Rules To Enforce Proper Discipline

Children love rules. If they're playing a game, the first thing they do is decide on the rules. So it's no wonder that parents often find that rules make discipline a lot easier.

Your child wants to watch TV after school. 'Homework first," you say. "It's the rule."

If your child knows it's the rule, he'll probably settle down without much grumbling.

What if you don't have many rules" You can get children to accept rules without a power struggle if you follow these steps:

1. Make sure the rule is reasonable and enforceable. If it's going to be a family rule, you'll have to see that it is enforced every time. And, at least at the beginning, you'll have to put up with some whining.

2. Start with one rule. Talk with your child. Let him know you're setting the rule. Talk about why it's important. Don't get emotional. Keep your voice calm.

Expect your child to complain. After all, he's used to doing things his way. Don't get into a battle, but don't give in. Just state the rule calmly.

3. Be consistent. When your child doesn't follow the rule, you'll have to enforce the consequence. That may mean turning off the TV or sending him to time out.

4. Don't argue. The rule is the rule. It will take a few days for your child to adjust, but he usually will.

Parents Can Help Children Become Life-Long Readers

Here are some ways that parents can help their children become life-long, active readers:

* Wonder aloud about how things might have turned out differently. If you're reading Little Women, you might ask, "What do you suppose would have happened if Jo had married Laurie?"

* Ask your child how she would write the ending if she were writing the book.

* Talk about why characters do what they did. If you're reading Charlotte's Web, you might ask, "Why do you suppose Charlotte decided to help Wilbur by writing words in her web?"

* Look at the details the author uses. Why did the author use certain words or images? What was he or she trying to convey? Did it work?

* Invite your child to go on a "scavenger hunt" for five new or unusual vocabulary words. Studies show that kids who read a lot do better on college entrance tests that those who don't - and one of the main reasons is that they develop a much larger vocabulary.

* Get your young reader to think about how the book is - or isn't - like her life. "Have you ever felt like that? Would you have done what this character did? How might you have handled this situation differently.